I had a wonderful time with my husband during his pass from the mob site. It was like he was never gone and we just fell back into our normal routines. It just seemed like he was coming back from any other extended TDY that he's had over the past several years.
It all didn't really hit me until Tuesday night though that I actually had to take him back the following day to the mob site. Watching him say good night to the kids for the last time for a year broke my heart. Listening to my 6 year old cry about not wanting Daddy to go, broke my heart. Listening to my 2 year old tell Daddy he didn't want him to go back on the boat, broke my heart. Watching my 9 year old be braver and stronger than any 9 year old should have to be, broke my heart.
It's been a rough couple days since he's been gone too. Walking into our bedroom, his scent is still there. I dread the day when I realize I can no longer smell it. Picking up his clothes and shoes and putting them away was painful knowing I wouldn't be doing it again for a year. Folding the last of his laundry for the next year brought me to tears.
I'm sure all these emotions are normal. As usual though I'm trying to stay busy and put on a strong front for the kids. I know that I need to be strong for them.
I'll post more about his leave in a few days and I know I have a few updates to give and even a blog award to recognize and pass on! Right now though I'm just trying to adjust.....