I'm still alive.
As time approaches, we're just trying to spend as much time together as a family as possible. Please bear with me while posting is practically non-existent. I promise I will get back into the routine of regular blogging soon. There are lots of feelings and emotions I'd like to discuss but don't want to just yet as I don't want to take time away from our togetherness.
I'm feeling very overwhelmed with deployment quickly approaching and I hate that I have no control over it. I'm one that likes to be in control and this is driving me crazy.
So I had an idea to start working on
goal #12 early and start working on de-cluttering our house. This way I can at least feel like I have control over something and as a bonus it helps keep my mind off of the inevitable - at least for the time being anyway.
I started tonight on my closet and dresser. Even though I feel that I regularly get rid of clothes, I still managed to get rid of two trash bags full of clothes and another stack of clothes (some with tags still attached!) that I'm hoping to find time to list on Ebay.
Next on my list is to de-clutter the rest of the bedroom. Currently, there are tons of military related books, rank and extra gear spewed throughout. I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do with it all - but I do know that it needs to be removed from my room! (Reminder: Add to the honey-do list of things to get done before the month is over)
Wish me luck on getting through the next few weeks. I'm sure I'll need it.
This is what happens when you bring your 2 year old into your room at 6:30 am in an attempt to get a few more minutes of sleep without him waking the older two:
He removes more than half of your shoes from the closet (on the other side of the room) and arranges them in neat lines. Who knows how far he would have gotten had I not opened my eyes when I did! He was
so proud of himself.
(Note: I know the picture is horrible - but in my defense - I took it with my phone while half asleep. )
OMFG! My youngest (age 2 1/2) just threw the mother of all tantrums! Seriously - 30 freaking minutes of him screaming & yelling, beating & kicking at the door and ramming the door with his body. And get this - all because I told him to go brush his teeth!
I believe that I'm a strong person but this little boy may bring me down yet over the next 15 months if I have to keep dealing with this! Please help me to get through this!
I'm not going to lie. It's been a rough day. No, not because I'm getting old! I'm only 29!
But because this is the first time in the past five years that I haven't had my husband by my side to celebrate my birthday with. I knew it was going to be hard, but I guess I didn't expect it to be quite this bad.
I've been quite emotional today - so much so - that even someone saying the nicest thing to me has caused me at times to cry (okay so maybe it's been more than just "at" times). Then they look at me like I'm crazy and of course I'm really in no mood to discuss my feelings and emotions with strangers (except apparently for those strangers in my computer, that is).
My close friends get it though... at least I think they do.
Even if I've not been emotionally stable today, I still have some good birthday stories and memories that I want to share. Just not today. I'm ready to get in bed to get this day over with. (oh yea, wait - the dog sh*t on my bed today - I guess his way of saying WTF - Happy Birthday but where's my Dad?) Hopefully I awaken tomorrow feeling refreshed and ready to share.
OBSCENITY ALERT:
This Blog is my outlet. It's where I share my thoughts and feelings. It's a place where I can vent. Not everyone thinks alike. People don't always share the same religious or political views. Some people (like me!) occasionally think in more “colorful” terms than others. Sorry, but I'm a big girl and can use cuss words and talk about not-so-mainstream stuff if I want to. If you find that sort of language offensive / shocking / annoying, you may want to stop reading now. Life as a military wife ain't always pretty. It's my life, though, so don't say I didn't warn you.
