Thursday, January 28, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
I'm Feeling A Little Lighter Today
I'm sorry I haven't really been posting much. Although I'm irritated with myself for being sorry. When I started blogging again I told myself that I wouldn't pressure myself to have a post every day or even every couple days unless I had something I truly wanted to share. I didn't (and still don't) want to spend countless hours thinking of what I'm going to blog about next. I don't like or need any added pressure in my life these days.
Which gets back to the whole reason behind this post. The past couple weeks have been hard. I've really struggled with getting use to SF's new work schedule. Yes, he's still home - but a lot of times I still feel like a single parent. These days he's gone before we get up in the morning and there are some nights when he will still be taking working call at 11:30 at night! And considering this is the same man who use to turn his phone off the second he walked in the door - I'm struggling.
I get it! I really do. I understand that it's a necessary evil. But that doesn't mean that I like it or that I even really know how to deal with it.
And what I realized last night is that I can't continue to hold it all in. I need to vent. I need to get it all out. I use to hold it all in because I didn't want to take something I had no control over and blow it up into a huge ordeal which inevitably would turn into an argument.
We only have a few months of time left together and I don't want to argue it away. I've heard from many other military spouses that the last few months are before deployment are spent arguing and bickering over little things. I was determined not to be one of those. But I failed.
Hopefully now that everything is out in the open, we'll better be able to handle it. My shoulders are feeling a little lighter today as I woke up realizing that I've learned a valuable lesson. Yes, my life is changing around me and I have no control over it but it doesn't mean that I have to be quiet about it. I'm still allowed to have anger and frustrations and I'm still allowed and should be voicing my concerns over it. Holding it in doesn't help - it only makes it worse.
It's been a hard lesson to learn and hopefully I won't have to learn it more than once.
Which gets back to the whole reason behind this post. The past couple weeks have been hard. I've really struggled with getting use to SF's new work schedule. Yes, he's still home - but a lot of times I still feel like a single parent. These days he's gone before we get up in the morning and there are some nights when he will still be taking working call at 11:30 at night! And considering this is the same man who use to turn his phone off the second he walked in the door - I'm struggling.
I get it! I really do. I understand that it's a necessary evil. But that doesn't mean that I like it or that I even really know how to deal with it.
And what I realized last night is that I can't continue to hold it all in. I need to vent. I need to get it all out. I use to hold it all in because I didn't want to take something I had no control over and blow it up into a huge ordeal which inevitably would turn into an argument.
We only have a few months of time left together and I don't want to argue it away. I've heard from many other military spouses that the last few months are before deployment are spent arguing and bickering over little things. I was determined not to be one of those. But I failed.
Hopefully now that everything is out in the open, we'll better be able to handle it. My shoulders are feeling a little lighter today as I woke up realizing that I've learned a valuable lesson. Yes, my life is changing around me and I have no control over it but it doesn't mean that I have to be quiet about it. I'm still allowed to have anger and frustrations and I'm still allowed and should be voicing my concerns over it. Holding it in doesn't help - it only makes it worse.
It's been a hard lesson to learn and hopefully I won't have to learn it more than once.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
A Perfect Ending to an Awesome Weekend
Toadmama is always proclaiming that her hubby is awesome - so I have to let everyone know that I have a pretty awesome hubby too! While he may not have all the fancy tools and may not make these, and he doesn't search for fodder for my blog - he sure does know how to cap off an awesome weekend.
But first the weekend (mine starts Thursday evening as I don't work on Friday's). Thursday night, Toadmama came over to hang out for TTT. We couldn't go anywhere since SF (aka my hubby) was out of town and the kids were sleeping so we hung out at the house with a few beverages and talked. It was great to catch up in person.
Then Friday evening I hosted fondue and wine night at my house. I really wish I would have remembered to get the camera out and take pictures. April, Jamie and Janelle came over with a variety of cookies, fruit, pretzels, pound cake, chocolate, breads, cheese and wine (and other drinks) and again the four of us sat around the table eating and laughing our asses off! A good time was had by all!
Saturday I packed the kids and drove to my best friends house in Pennsylvania to spend the night. The kids had an awesome time hanging out together (even though G got sick that evening) and Amber and I had just as much, if not more fun. Of course we had a ton to catch up on and we were up til almost 4am playing Wii bowling.
Needless to say, it was a little rough getting up Sunday morning to drive home. But we did it and got home around noon. SF was finally home as well and we laid the kids down for naps and promptly took naps ourselves!
So by now you're probably wondering what my husband being awesome has to do with all of this...especially since I didn't see him most of the weekend. Well, after dinner and after the kids were put to bed, SF ran a hot bath, lit the candles and told me to go relax with a book in the tub! Which I did! How awesome is that?
It was a perfect ending to an awesome weekend spent with family and friends.
But first the weekend (mine starts Thursday evening as I don't work on Friday's). Thursday night, Toadmama came over to hang out for TTT. We couldn't go anywhere since SF (aka my hubby) was out of town and the kids were sleeping so we hung out at the house with a few beverages and talked. It was great to catch up in person.
Then Friday evening I hosted fondue and wine night at my house. I really wish I would have remembered to get the camera out and take pictures. April, Jamie and Janelle came over with a variety of cookies, fruit, pretzels, pound cake, chocolate, breads, cheese and wine (and other drinks) and again the four of us sat around the table eating and laughing our asses off! A good time was had by all!
Saturday I packed the kids and drove to my best friends house in Pennsylvania to spend the night. The kids had an awesome time hanging out together (even though G got sick that evening) and Amber and I had just as much, if not more fun. Of course we had a ton to catch up on and we were up til almost 4am playing Wii bowling.
Needless to say, it was a little rough getting up Sunday morning to drive home. But we did it and got home around noon. SF was finally home as well and we laid the kids down for naps and promptly took naps ourselves!
So by now you're probably wondering what my husband being awesome has to do with all of this...especially since I didn't see him most of the weekend. Well, after dinner and after the kids were put to bed, SF ran a hot bath, lit the candles and told me to go relax with a book in the tub! Which I did! How awesome is that?
It was a perfect ending to an awesome weekend spent with family and friends.
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