Are You Wearing Shoes?

So we are on our way to church and we stop to get my much needed cup of coffee before we go. Shitface is in 7-11 and here is the conversation/argument the kids were having:

Girl: I don't have to wear my flip flops right now because they are easy to put on and take off; so I can put them on real quick when we get to church.

Boy 1: Why are you wearing shoes?

Girl: I'm not, I just told you that!

Boy 1: Yes you are!

Girl: No, I'm not - Look at my feet - I don't have shoes on!

Boy 1: Yes, you do. I see them.

Girl: No you don't - they're on the floor!

Boy 1: No they're not!

At this point in time, I think I'm going to pull my hair out and yell into the backseat for them to knock it off!! I tell Boy 1 that Girl is clearly not wearing shoes and why must they have this argument- it is too early for Mommy to take this and especially with no coffee!!!

Later in the day, Boy 1 again is irritating Girl. She says, " will you cut it off!!" I just started laughing as I tried to explain to her that she has two sayings together and it's either "Knock it off" or "Cut it out". I still don't know if she comprehended what I was saying because later on I heard her say will you "Cut it". I guess that works too :-)

Keeping Your Cool

So I ordered dinner tonight, as I had no desire to cook and it was tons of fun torturing the kids and convincing them that I wasn't making dinner tonight and so they were going to starve. When Boy 1 actually started to whimper a little I had to cool it because the last thing I need is him crying all night and than telling people that Mommy doesn't feed him.

So back to my story, while I was on the phone ordering dinner - of course Girl and Boy 1 were yelling and screaming and arguing about who knows what. (They'll argue over the color of the sky these days if you let them!) Boy 2 than starts crying as I walk out of the room so I could hear. They all proceed to follow me around, when I finally decided there was no point in trying to escape. (Believe me, I've tried many times - with many, many failed attempts.) I continued talking and upon completion of taking my order (Greek Salad, Mega Fries and Quesadillas for me and Shitface and pizza for the kids - just in case you were wondering), the guy congratulated me for keeping my cool through it all and told me he was impressed.

As I got off the phone, I thought that was odd - that's normally how all of my phone conversations go while the kids are home and no one has ever congratulated me before - they generally sound annoyed at having to listen to all the commotion or they very politely (as polite as possible I guess when you're getting ready to hang up on someone) say in mid-sentence "Ok, I have to go now - bye" before I can even finish my sentence.

I can only assume that he too has small children and can relate - so I can appreciate his comment and congratulations.

On a side note - if anyone is wondering - yes, my eye is still watering. It's been 3 days now!!!